User blog:Arissa123/Snow Place to Go (Done my Way)
(It all starts with them on the ship partying just like the original version.) Russell: I can't wait to have fun! Toothy: (drinking his coconut milk) Me too! Flaky: (to herself) Let's just hope nothing goes wrong, Flaky. Cuddles: (to Giggles) Isn't this romantic? Giggles: It sure is, Cuddles. It's all going smoothly. (Suddenly, the ship crashes.) Cuddles: What the hell was that? (Everyone looks to see what caused the crash.) Russell: Lumpy, what the hell happened? Lumpy: Hmm, maybe this gun can figure it out. Flaky: How can a gun solve the problem? Lumpy: Well, it's really hard to explain, but I'll give it a shot. (Lumpy fires a missile.) All except Lumpy: Ooh. (Then, the ship catches on fire.) Cuddles: We better get out of here! Lumpy: Jump off guys! (Lumpy, Russell, Giggles, and Cuddles jump off as Flaky tries to.) Flaky: Ugh, come on. (The ship is now burnt and broken. Everyone decides to find food because they're starving.) Russell: Oh, just a spatula. (Flaky crawls in a box and finds a garden gnome.) Flaky: I think I found my passion. (Hugs gnome.) (Toothy finds a pair of scissors.) Toothy: What the fuck are these supposed to do around here? (Cuddles finds a saw.) Cuddles: Ooh. This could come in handy later. I doubt it though. (Giggles finds a can of beans. It was perfect.) Giggles: (gasps) Hey guys, I found some can of beans, it's per-- (The ship mast falls on Giggles while Cuddles, Toothy, Russell, Lumpy, and Flaky scream.) Cuddles: Nooooooooooooo! Giggles!!!!!!!!!! (Cuddles rushes over to the mast and lays and begins to cry.) Cuddles: She was so amazing. Why the fuck did this thing have to fall on her? (Cuddles cries as he pulls her hand off the beans and holds it in his hands. Russell and Toothy try to confront him.) Lumpy: I got a fire started guys. Cuddles: I DON'T CARE ABOUT A FUCKING CAMPFIRE! I WANT MY GIRLFRIEND BACK! Lumpy: Cuddles, just forget it. Cuddles: NO, I WILL NEVER FORGET IT! I'M OUT OF HERE! GOODBYE! (Cuddles leaves while everyone watches.) Toothy: Hopefully he doesn't get lost. Lumpy: Never mind him. Flaky, I'll you open the can of beans please? Flaky: Why should I? Toothy: You hardly do fucking anything! Russell: Just help us out. Please? Flaky: Ugh, fine. (She tries to open it, but can't.) Flaky: I can't open it. I've tried so many times. Lumpy: Fine, I'll use this can opener I found. (Lumpy places the can opener down and Flaky places the can down.) Russell: Um, nothing's happening. Lumpy: Oh, shit! I forgot to plug it in. And there's no fucking extension cords here. So let's just forget it. Toothy: What do we do now? Lumpy: Well, I'm going to fix the ship. See you. Russell: Bye, Lumpy! Toothy: Take care! (Lumpy heads off while it fades. Now on to the next scene.) Russell: I thought this was gonna be fun but now it's a fucking disaster. Toothy: I know. (Gasps) Look what I found! An ice burger! (Toothy eats it.) Toothy: Ah, brain freeze! Aahhhhhhhh!!! (Toothy's head begins to turn to ice then dies.) Russell: Toothy, are you okay? Toothy? (Toothy isn't moving.) Russell: Oh, crap, we lost him. Now it's just us, Flaky. (Flaky is too distracted on her gnome.) Flaky: We'll have a great time together, don't you think? Russell: Flaky, I'm going to look for fish to eat, I'll be right back. Flaky: K. Let's go flying gnome. (Imitates airplane.) (Meanwhile, Russell is finding fish.) Russell: Come on, work. (Then, the fishing rod breaks.) Russell: Fuck! I'm so screwed now. Oh, well. (Russell heads back to where Flaky was, but Flaky is nowhere to be seen. Only the garden gnome is there. Russell: Flaky? Where did you go? (Russell gasps and sees bits of Flaky's dandruff on the ground.) Russell: Oh my god, how the hell did she die? (Just then, Russell sees an orca in the water.) Russell: I gotta get out of here. That creature in there must've fucking killed her! (Then, the ice cracks.) Russell: Oh no! I'm fucking surrounded! Come on spatula, do your thing. (Russell paddles with his spatula. Then the orca's head gets closer.) Russell: Oh my god I'm doomed and my ice is about to melt! Theres only one thing to do. I'm going to pray. "Please let me be safe, please let me be safe, please?" Huh? (It turns out he is safe.) Russell: Yes! Now it's time to kill that orca with my spatula! (The orca is about to approach Russell.) Russell: Hey orca, take this! (Russell throws the spatula on the orca which causes him to die.) Russell: Yes, he's gone! (Just then, Lumpy arrives on the ship that he fixed.) Lumpy: Come on, Russell, I'll take you home. (Russell boards the ship.) Lumpy: Where the hell is everyone else? Russell: Oh, it's a long story. It was a "whale of a time" get it? Lumpy: Um? Russell: Let's just go. The End. Hope you enjoyed my version of Snow Place to Go Category:Blog posts